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An Open Letter Seeking Clarification About Christmas Music

Christmas music

Christmas Music: An open letter seeking some clarification

Dear Current Generations,

Excuse me, I’m new around here.  I would like a little information, please.  Actually, I feel inundated with information.  What I really need is clarification. It’s about this thing you call Christmas.  What is that, exactly?  Wikipedia says that Christmas is “an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ and a widely observed holiday, celebrated generally on December 25 by millions of people around the world.” Ummm, does that need updating?  Because what I’m observing isn’t exactly matching up with that description.  For instance…

Christmas musicSince way back before Thanksgiving (which seemed strangely overlooked, considering that would seem like an important holiday, but what do I know), I have been listening to what you call “Christmas music.”  Boy, if I thought that was going to bring any clarity, I was dead wrong.  I decided to listen to ten songs in a row and see what common themes I could find.  Here’s what I discovered:

1. A pretty important baby who would bring hope to many generations was born in a quiet little town.  (Sounds like what I’m looking for.)

2. Somebody wanted to wish me a merry Christmas in Spanish and English.  (I think?  I don’t actually speak Spanish…)

3. Some guy was thinking about his (wife? girlfriend?) sleeping alone, and somehow that was like a holiday.  (This is Christmas music? Totally confusing.)

4. Evidently, a child witnessing his mother kissing Santa (underneath his middle toe?) is not going to sit well with Daddy or bode well for Mommy.  (#RuhRoh #PotentiallyIncriminatingEvidence)

5. Snow makes Christmas better.  (I like snow, too, just not as obsessed about it as the writer of this song.  Seems like snow might inconvenience a lot of people, but, oh well…)

6. Kids are threatened by this song’s writer with Santa’s arrival.  (Soooo…Santa carries more weight — not pun intended — than Mom and Dad?  I thought kids were supposed to look forward to Santa’s arrival.  And what does this have to do with Christmas?)

7. People in Africa may not even know that the Christmas season is upon us.  (Why is this?  Can we not tell them?  Perhaps we need to clarify before telling them?)

8. One kid couldn’t afford to buy baby Jesus anything for Christmas, but since he was a self-described accomplished drummer, he offered Him one of his best songs.  (I like this one, though it does seem that a drum may not be the most soothing of instruments to play for a newborn infant, king or otherwise — just a thought.)

9. The news about a newborn king seemed to spread from nature to the lowly to a king, who announced it to all the people.  (Sounds somewhat in line with the Jesus story, albeit in the form of some sort of Middle Eastern Telephone game.)

10. The singer of this one didn’t want anything from Santa or anyone else for that matter, just a certain other person beneath her Christmas tree. (That would be really weird…).  (This was a catchy tune, but the singer seemed a little…shall we say…clingy.  Not sure I would want to be her Christmas gift.  To each his own, I suppose.)

Observations from Christmas Music

So, if I were to figure out the meaning of Christmas from that random “Christmas music” list, I would conclude…what?  See, I told you what I needed most was not information but clarification.  Could you clarificate for me, please?

Respectfully yours,
The Next Generation
P.S.: That’s enough for one conversation.  I also have questions about Christmas shows, Elf on a Shelf, Santa, shopping, stuff like that.  Mind if I ask those, too?

About Al Ainsworth

Al Ainsworth is a values storyteller. He works with individuals, businesses, churches, and other organizations to pass along their values through the stories they tell…and re-tell.

Al is the author of Lines in the Gravel, Stories from the Roller Coaster (of a Faith Life), and the Coach Dave series. Subscribe to his email list for more values storying.

4 Replies

  1. Michael

    As much as I love the various covers of “Little Drummer Boy” I have to admit I never thought about how traumatic a drum solo could be to a newborn. Thanks for pointing that out and causing me to laugh, literally, out loud.

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